I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
I woke up this morning with a half eaten bagel and an empty pack of imitation crab meat in my bed. This is going to be my response to pick up lines now.
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
Randomize