sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Randomize
