Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Randomize
