I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
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