would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
Randomize
