My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
Randomize
