a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
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