i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
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