how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
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