so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
Randomize
