I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
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