I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
Randomize