you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
Winning the lottery was the best thing that ever happened to my penis.
Greatest pickup line ever: "We are out celebrating winning the lottery."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
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