Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
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