Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
Randomize
