chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
death, taxes, and me drunk texting you are 3 certainties in life
Randomize
