Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Randomize
