my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
Can I color on your dick again?
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
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