its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
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