I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
Randomize
