"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
Randomize
