Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
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