Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
Randomize
