i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
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