Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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