I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Randomize
