her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
I need a beard to bite.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
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