No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
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