i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
