you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize