I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
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