Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
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just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
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