Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
