Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Randomize
