Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize