I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
Randomize