Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
Randomize
