Your dad touched me again.
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
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