My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
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