The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
Randomize
