some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
These 23 People Had Coworkers From Hell
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
21 NSFW Facts About Famous Celebrities That Will Blow Your Mind
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
How does it feel to date your dad?