I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
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