Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize
