I'm going to rape someone's good day.
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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