Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
Randomize
