Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
In other news, I just burned my penis
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
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