Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
So many bounce houses so little time
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
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