I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
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