There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
Randomize
