Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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